7 things your guy expects from you! - A relationship guide to bachelors and unmarried!

"Being happy in personal life is the most important criteria to have a peaceful and successful professional career. Study suggests that lot of people go in depression because of their sour break ups with their respective guy and girl which in return effect their professional being. It would have been great if we knew the do's and don'ts of a relationship well in advance before committing to a relation. What a guy wants from a girl and what exactly he is ready to give in return have always been a topic of discussion in perhaps all the age groups and geographies."

 So, let's start with what a guy wants from a girl? 

1. To be that one person who she desires and wants to spend her maximum time with, no matter what stops her from doing so!

 Yes, I know! You might think that it would make him to take you for granted but don't you think, this is how a relationship has to be. If he can't at the least take you for granted then who else he could? Just think about the last time he chose his friends or a cricket match over you! 

2. Explain him your reasons of having done anything in a loving way while making him feel how much you missed him even in a group of people and be firm at the same time!

 Yes, I too understand that the habit of explaining things may eventually infuse doubts in his minds but don't you think, those doubts may pile up if you don't do it at all! Moreover, if you explain yourself in a firmest of the way, I am sure he would think twice in doubting you. Be truthful in your reasons and you don't have to remember what reason you gave him the last time.

3. Argue, fight, disagree and debate with him in an intellectual discussion.

 I always advise my female friends and colleagues to be that girl in his life who could challenge his intellect. Who doesn't want somebody who could help us out with her suggestions when we require it the most which could add value to life? Arguing, fighting, disagreeing and debating on every single intellectual topics challenges his IQ and there are high chances he would turn to you for suggestions in his most important decisions of life which could include "having a future with you"! 

4. Never avoid his calls or messages even if you are in your busiest time of the day. Even if you do, ensure to call back.

Yes, it goes true for everyone and not only for a girl for his guy or a guy for his girl. A single incident of ignoring calls or messages might turn out in a habit. Never do that. Would you like to be a person who can't be trusted while somebody is in a need of something? What if, you lost somebody in an accident while you were busy sorting out your targets and achievements in your office and you had chosen to ignore his/her call at that time? Even if you do miss his calls or messages due to heavy work load, ensure to call back as soon as you find time. 

5. Dedicate yourself to him. Solely and completely. Loose your identity! 

Isn't it a nice thing to be loved by somebody to such an extent that you don't even know who you were when you started? Nah.. Don't be a pessimist now! It's always good to love a person in such a way that he is there on your mind 24/7. He is there with you while you wake up, taking bath, going to office, in those leisure time at office and sometimes in your busiest of schedule and till the time you sign off for the day and go to sleep! Though virtually but be assured he is there! Make it a habit and I am sure, you will definitely miss and cherish this! 

6. Never go over board while praising your male colleague or a friend. 

Yes, nobody wants to feel insecure by a potential competitor! What if, he starts praising his female colleague or a friend in the same way? Would you feel good about it? You might but that in most of the cases do not hold true for a guy who thinks about a future with you. 

7. Never be absent for too long.

Even if you take your every step wisely and do everything correctly, there might be times when frustration and anger due to ego clashes takes over your relationship and you might sound negative about your own choice. Those are the times when you require that perseverance and belief more which could take you through those unwanted phases in relation. Understand! Its not the person but the situation which are unfavorable and you need to give it sometime or time for those unfavorable cloud to pass. But be sure of not being absent for too long because remember, he is missing you at the other end too and it should not hamper your future with him.

So girls, if you know you are with a right guy then be ready to sacrifice your every self to him and expect and get the same or rather more in return in terms of love. 

Now, once you know what your guy wants, it becomes easier to tell what do you want? I am sure it is to reciprocate everything of what you do to him or at least half of it, if not completely! 

Guys, if you do all the above written things to her then I am sure there won't be any single incident where you feel like calling off a relation! 

Every relation in this world except the one with your parents is a "Give and Take" relation. If you are nice to somebody then you have all the rights to expect the same in return but if you yourself are at fault so you better know what it is! Don't you? 

Thanks for reading! 

Being a dad to a family.....

"A beautiful Saturday morning ( as it is being called by my mommy), though I personally have never gotten to see the beauty in Saturday morning ever. That is because I usually wake up at 11 AM on Saturdays!  And why not? I feel I have earned it after a week long hardship at work. The only beauty in Saturday morning which I could recollect or see is the bed tea in the morning or sometimes in the noon while I wake up, brought to me by my sweet mommy! Everything seems so perfect. I do not have to go anywhere and I am not even being asked to do anything at home. Still, household chores are in a systematic manner where the inventory of each and everything is maintained as perfectly as it is maintained in the manufacturing companies. I, apparently, never got to realise how it was so perfect! Then there came one more Saturday where I woke up as usual and saw the entire home in chaos without knowing the actual reason of it. Out of curiosity, I asked my mom as to what's wrong and why are we loosing the peace at our home? The answer which I got, not only shocked me but made me to realise one of the biggest truth of our life which we always ignore to accept."

The life would have never been the same if that one person wouldn't have sacrificed his dreams, desires, choices and leisure time to give us a comfortable life in which we never have to think anything but making our own life worth living in the way we wanted to! He lost his sleep over our studies to ensure we get good grades, lost his comfort to give us a comfortable life, did not enjoy his salary the way he wanted to but made sure it is spent in the way we wanted to! We kept complaining, cribbing, shouting and even worse cursing him for not having understood us (at least today I realise he did not have to), for not fulfilling all our needs (which today I feel was useless). The needs? Never got to even realise what his needs might be! 

He fell sick and bed ridden and then I got to realise that everything in home is because of him. It was his decision that the life which we live had to be lived in this way, it was he who shaped us in the human being we are today, no matter how strict he is but his strict behaviour taught me to be afraid of loosing cores of my life. It taught me to be strict too in the disciplines of my life. It taught me to take responsibility, make commitments and promises and more importantly to keep those commitments and promises. It's nobody but my dad who trained me to dream and assured me that he would always be there to take care of rest. 

Today, when I look back at my life! I realise he had already kept his promises and he had not only been a dad to me but also the dad to entire family! And I wonder, can I be the DAD to the entire family? Can I run the house the way he has without being selfish? Can I be the light of their blurring eyes? Can I ever understand how important it is to take care of our household chores as efficiently as we take care of works at workplace? 

Being a dad to a family is not easy! But it's indeed better than wasting our time in other materialistic cores. You know what I mean! Don't you? 

Thanks for reading!

Things of past

"Love oozed out of every bit of your action, your texts, your calls, your touch! We made promises! Got committed to something which we were never sure we could've achieved! You told that you would always be there for me. You told, "we are meant to be together till eternity". You reflected compassion, you empathised, you sympathised, you accepted my pain and we exchanged each other's agonies! You pretended to be supporting me during my struggle to make a prolific career for myself and I, perhaps, did the same! We went along well, people were envious. They bitched about us and we stood still and strong in all the adversities and complexities!"

Today, these are the things of past! We definitely have moved on. We are indeed happy in our respective space. We don't care about each other anymore. A simple text from you asking me whether I am doing fine, challenges my ego today and I replied informing you that I think I am better off without you! 
This is perhaps the most common situation in all the relations which starts on a perfect note and holds a promise for fruitful and genuine relationship in future to live by! But what we forget is the impact that these relation put on our respective souls. We are forced to live the rest of our lives with a broken heart which would probably or possibly can never trust somebody else in future. Even if it trusts, the bruises from past show up again and make the current relation too a burden to carry. People definitely move on, some even claim to have forgotten all the pain which they received from their past but I have not met a single person till date who doesn't remember how he/she was treated in his/her past relationship. Everybody lives in oblivion to this wonderful feeling called love which at one point in time was the only fuel to their existence. What went wrong? Where did we fumble? Why didn't we try to make things alright? Why couldn't we bid each other a well deserved farewell? What was so important that separated us? Was that relation meant to be broken? If that's the case then what's the guarantee that we may ever have a stable relation in future?
I have not been able to find the answers to any of these questions! Or perhaps, not knowing the answers to all the questions is the safest way to escape a situation.

Thanks for reading!

18th Edition of Express Technology Sabha > June 18-21, 2015 > The Lalit Golf Resort> Goa

The 18th Edition of Express Technology Sabha, India’s premier e-governance congregation.  Supported by the Department of Information Technology, GOI, the 18th Edition of Technology Sabha 2015 is all set to create a new benchmark in e-governance seminars through leadership dialogues, networking opportunities and a technology show case with a singular aim to gather policy makers, decision makers and implementers of ICT within the government and the service providers to deliberate and debate on ICT challenges, which are unique to the community, to deliver a more transparent and efficient government.

The Eighteenth Technology Sabha will be held at The Lalit Golf Resort, Goa, between June 18 -21, 2015 (4 days & 3 Nights) where the benchmark will touch new heights with the congregation of who’ s who from the government sector.

The theme for the 18th Edition of Express Technology Sabha is ‘9 Pillars of Digital India; taking eGovernance to Next Level’

The following are the proposed tracks that would be covered in the 18th Edition:
·         Cyber Security
·         Big Data & BI
·         Managing Surveillance
·         Storage Solutions
·         Cloud Computing
·         Unified Communication & Video Conferencing
·         Printing in Government (including DMS & MPS)
·         Green Governance (Green IT for Smart Cities)
·         On the Go (Mobility influencing EA)
·         Dynamics of Next Generation Data Center
·         Mobility Solutions
·         Broadband
·         DR solutions
·         And Many More

Why participate in Technology Sabha?

·         Get an insight into the plan of e-development of Digital India vision.
·          Understand the multi-pronged strategy of e-infrastructure creation that facilitates and promotes Smart Cities.
·         Discuss strategic trends in e-governance and the future road maps of state governments and gain a strategic overview helping you identify your future business path.
·         Engage with your government customers and be a key driver in the new opportunities and spending on ICT solutions, software and technologies in the government.
·         Forge and strengthen relationships with IT Leaders from the government  to discuss the most critical and current technology challenges and pain points.
·         Network with close to 100 creme-de-la-crème of government IT leaders from across India over 3 days.
Who will attend?

·         Secretary – Information Technology, GOI and prominent members from the e-Governance Group
·         IT Secretaries from major states
·         Key NIC / NICSI / DeitY representatives
·         e-Governance heads from state government
·         IT Heads from various government nodal bodies
·         IT Heads from various departments from 8 major states
·         IT Heads from Defence establishment
·         IT Heads from Railways
·         Director – Digital India program & State SEMT heads


For more details on 18th Edition of Express Technology Sabha, Log on to www.technologysabha.com

For Sponsorship opportunities:
Please contact,
Amit Tiwari
E-Mail ID: amit.tiwari@expressindia.com
Mobile: +91-8095502597

"Successful failures"

"I have been an active follower of spirituality since I was 9. I still remember the days when I was used to listen to those high funda spiritual discourses at the centres of Radha Soami Satsang Beas (RSSB), the spiritual  organisation based out of "Beas" which is a small city located on the bank of river Beas. Fortunately for me, those discourses transformed me into more positive person and in the person who I am today."

Today, while I listen to same discourses I realise that there cannot be anything in this world which can provide us contentment. We keep running towards achieving our goals, our ambitions and fulfilling our parents dreams, a friends promise or a girl friend's demand. But what do we get in the end! Criticism! Criticism of having not done something which is left out after doing all the hardships. May be, I am wrong in analysing but one thing i can say is that we cannot keep anybody satisfied. People here, are fighting for their space and to protect their ego. You bend once and trust me there will be 100's of people to take you on a ride. Even the best of situations turns out into a disaster and then eventually we feel, "why god is so unfair to us?" Or May be god doesn't love us as much as they do to Ambani's, Tata's and Birla's. But do we ever thank that almighty for anything. No! It's only the human tendency where we enjoy blaming others for mistakes or even worse, for our mistakes!  Look around yourself, be it in our professional or personal space, we, the so called topmost creation of god, blame each other for every agony we have or as if that's not enough, we crib! And while cribbing in each and every situation we forget to live our life. I feel, it's high time that we start appreciating each and every moment of our life. If not every moment, then at least the moments we spend with our families. 

I remember having a religious debate with few of my friends and they amused me when they said that doing good to others, breaking our heads on stones, lighting an "agarbatti" in front of a stone statue, means "Spirituality" to them. I don't disagree! At least, that creates an environment of being spiritual. But what I don't agree is to spend our entire life in doing so! because out of 100 times we pray to god, 100 times we ask or rather demand something or the other. Hence, I do not call you a spiritual person. We must believe in the fact that we will anyways get those things which we deserve but not which we think we should have. If we call ourselves the topmost creation of god, then we must have faith in the creator. 

It may all sound like another person giving "gyan". But my point is, " if it does sound like a gyan to you then perhaps you should have imbibed it long ago." 

Nothing we will achieve by enticing or appeasing others in this world because in the end everybody faces that eventuality of death. Let's make this world a better place to live our lives and not the place which currently looks to me as another organisation where we, as an employee, are busy appeasing each other. I call this as a " Successful failures" because we might be successful in winning others (human beings) confidence but eventually we will all be a "failure" if we continue doing this. 

Thanks for reading!

"Appreciate thyself!"

"Last week I was in Hyderabad for an event organised by my organisation, the 17th edition of Express Technology Sabha and as many of us think that organizing an event is no big deal! Yeah, you got it right, NO BIG DEAL! (Though, my friends & colleagues in event management would kill me if I say this :)).

While I was in the stage of creating a buzz or hype about the event before the event, one of my colleague (who is a journalist) asked me whether I would be attending the event or not (Perhaps, he would have thought that me being a sales guy, there was nothing I could have done during the event). So, unarguably my answer was "YES, I would be!" And his reaction on that was, " Great, then you must be enjoying all these four days"! I thought of explaining him the pain involved in "execution" part of the event but I held myself back and realized he wouldn't understand that."

The idea of narrating this incident was to make you realize as to how "unappreciative " we all are towards others work ( others include people who is of our age, junior or subordinate)! We don't realize what others go through while doing anything. To add to the agonies, we always make assumption as if we know in an out about everything. But yes! We do appreciate others work when it is all about our bosses, super bosses or somebody in strong position who we think, can be useful if we appreciate him/her. So, question is, "why are we so ambiguous"? Let me not dig into finding the answer for that! Cos "appreciation" now a days have become a matter of solicitation and we only do that if we feel we are going to be benefited from the person who we are appreciating. But have we been truthful to ourselves while doing so! Let's not fake it and try to be more honest in our feedback.

 

And the perfect solution to this is to "appreciate thyself"! Cos that is what we all want from others. Isn't it?? So, why can't we do it for ourselves? Once you start appreciating yourself for all you have been doing for so long to people, to your organisation and to yourself, you will feel yourself filled in with so much of confidence that your inner self will have clarity about who you should be appreciative towards! 

As far as I am concerned, I never appreciated myself in all these years for what I have been doing or giving to people but everything which I did or put in my soul into have made me stronger enough to quickly decide that there's no point appreciating others. Rather, it's high time that I "APPRECIATE MYSELF" for having been able to do whatever I could!!!!

Hope, we all agree to it!

Thanks for reading!

"Take me home!"

".. And it's a bright morning with already scorching sun providing excess heat to everybody and everything which is coming in its way! Birds have left their reapective nest in search of food. 

There's a voice from background similar to my mommy which requests me to wake up! I thought I was dreaming but then there is a sense of summer (already arrived) and I have already started sweating. I open my eyes, note the time in my mobile ( the most valuable thing for me in my vicinity) and it's 10 am. My mommy switched off the fan so that I could wake up and perhaps that's why I was sweating. :) Oh I forgot, Yes! It's a Sunday morning with no obligation of going to office, login on time and keep getting exhausted till 7.30 pm. It's only me and my favourite time pass! (Writing) with a cup of tea (converting in an ice tea. Oh I so wish! I could see that transition). LIFE's Good! Isn't it?"

The idea of narrating the beginning of my morning is not to push you in boredom! It's all about appreciating the tiniest of moments which we live without regretting that we could've done it little better. The fact is that we really couldn't have! We all are so possessed with our own problems, tensions and agonies that! Oh wait! Problem???

What problem do we talk about? Is it because our girlfriend/boyfriend has not fulfilled the promise made with us? Or because we don't get desired respect or love from the person we love? May be, we did not get good appraisal in our respective offices or may be our talent is not justified at office with the kind of paycheck we are offered! 

Oh now I get it! We call these circumstances as a problem. So let me be a little harsh or possibly a little rude to all of us. If we consider these as a PROBLEM, then mate! we are blessed and probably the "chosen ones" that we have those problems because we can never realise what actually problem, pain and agonies are! If you are really interested in knowing where does this 'so called' character namely PROBLEM resides? Request you to please visit "malignant diseases treatment centres" of any hospital. Yes! It's the same place where a deadly disease called CANCER is being treated and cured ( oh! At least they tell so) You may find many people who are just like us but the few differences between us (them and we) is that they don't know whether they would see tomorrow's SUN because they do not have the same cells in their tissues unlike us. Few carcinogens have mutated their cells into an altogether different cell category called CANCER CELLS! 

One more difference worth observing is, they are happy! They are fighting with a devil inside, on daily basis and when they defeat that devil even for one day, they get the confidence of fighting it again, to survive for one more day... A real fighters, isn't it?

 

Whenever you think you have a problem or you cannot deal with a tension, look around and just think that you compete with a bunch of people who have been an epitome of Problems but they are still a bunch of "HAPPY PEOPLE"! Inspired! Determined! 

They are indeed the best corporate subjects to learn from! 

Thanks for reading! :)